Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Happy Blogiversary!!

One year ago today I started my blog!!  And it was a success (for me) up until February it seems.  To celebrate my blogiversary I am going to upload some pics!!  And then I might make a few reflections stemming from my first ever blog post.  This could be fun!
A view from the flight that never took flight ;-(

Talk about dinner with a view!!

2nd verse...not like the 1st!  Day 2









Really now?!...







Musk Ox.  Stinky!

I really do!  And I think it hearts me, too!!!




Above is what happens when you set your shutter to take multiple pics and you didn't
realize it!  Gotta fill in the gaps somehow, some way!

Totally out of my realm!



Alaska Bestie and I.  Gotta stay warm at 43 degrees.  Cover thy head to avoid losing body heat!

Should be sleeping, but I have already been up this long...why sleep?

View from our table



Wonder Lake, random dude.


Leaving much to the imagination.  I LOVE this!  And it was pouring rain and the bus was about to leave us.
One shot deal!







The bird who was out to kill us.  Three times!!










Oh how I miss jeans and jackets...
















Goodbye!  sniff sniff

Monday, June 25, 2012

Readjustment

I am having a really hard time. First let me say that in Alaska, technology is scarce. I had limited to no Internet access there. It was ridiculous. I felt so far removed from society, but all of those feelings are null and void when you have to brake hard to avoid hitting two black bears crossing the road!! So that's my story and I am sticking to it. I plan to expand more on my glorious, eventful, peaceful, exciting, exhilarating, productive trip soon. Complete with pictures. I took 1200 of them! I am having an extremely hard time adjusting back to this crappy state in which I live. It sucks. I hate it. And to top things off, a tropical storm will be arriving at my doorstep in a matter of hours. I am simply disgusted. Not with the storm, but with the weather. I am starting to question some things in my life. Having a hard time finding the answers. Not sure if its post-vacation shock or what. I think I need an intervention. Psychological intervention. I will put that on my "what-to-do" list (not 'who') for tomorrow. Could I be anymore vague? Still feel so far removed from nursing. I swear I have forgotten everything I have learned. I have to get my head back in the game. School starts back mid-August. Pics coming soon!!

Monday, June 11, 2012

Worst Blogger EVER!!!

I have had numerous requests for un updated blog post.  Okay, well 2 requests by the same person, but still...and that person is just being nosey.

I am just not feelin' it.  I have lost the warm butterfly feelings that I felt during my first semester in nursing school.  Is it because it is Summer??  Will the desire of reading NCLEX study guides come back to me?  I sure hope...for the future patient's sake!

I think I just have a case of Summeritis.  It is my first summer off since 2008.  I have picked up some wonderful literature...er--books.  I am Fifty Shades of Ashamed to name a few of them.  I have taken on a really pathetic existence.  I stay up until 3 a.m. doing nothing and then the next day I am up at 8 and then later depressed and agitated from my lack of sleep and most of all my desire to get more sleep.  Yes, I want to sleep more, but I just love all the stinking quiet that occurs in the middle of the night.  But then again, if I went to sleep, it would still be quiet.  But all of that will be over in a couple if days...

...because I am going to ALASKA!!!!  On Wednesday my Bestie and I will be taking the greatest state on Earth by storm in our 8 day road trip.  I have been researching and brushing up on my photography skills.  I have a Canon 100-400mm f/4.5-5.6L IS to assist me in my quest to get some really great shots.  Hopefully this lens will allow me to keep a safe distance from the hungry grizzly bears I hope to encounter!


I will make a solemn vow to update more frequently.  Maybe I can update live from the TUNDRA!  How awesome would that be?!  And I did just have one realization.  I have Summeritis because I just passed Statistics which I had put off taking for 4 YEARS!!  Yes, people (nosey ones included) I made a C.  It is more than I could have hoped for or even dreamed of.  Especially since last week I was worried about failing.  Truly a blessing to know that I am done with all of my Pre-reqs and able to graduate in May!!!
So I will make this voluntary oath.  Because I will have nothing else to do each night while trying to go to sleep, I will make every attempt to upload some pics and provide a daily journal of my travels.  It will benefit me greatly when trying to compile a post-journey scrapbook!

Until then...

Friday, May 4, 2012

So many titles...I'll just make a list!

I have cheated myself.  I have absolutely cheated myself out of almost 90 days of memories.  Not only have I cheated myself, I have cheated my many faithful followers.  Luckily, my name was not listed in any obituary.  I am still alive.  I have been busy.

It started out like this:
I started to have really horrible pains in my hands (bilaterally nonetheless).  It became so bad I couldn't even play Scramble with Friends on my phone!  Not sure what was going on there, but I am better now.  I was in such desperate pain I even went to the doctor!  He did a complete neurological assessment on my (I could have done a better job) and gave me some Mucinex-D.  Huh?


1st Clinical Rotation Ends:
I survived the mean old bat that made me look like a fool.  We ended everything on good terms.  When she sat down with me and had my evaluation, she made a startling revelation that she had made a mistake and "misunderstood" me.  And she was sorry.  Too late, lady!  You dashed my self-confidence.  That was February 22nd.

2nd Clinical Rotation begins:
We expected the worst: Care plans out the wazoo, nurses notes, patient assessments, you name it.  My wonderful group members and I were terrified!  What began with high expectations later became "just do it as a group", or "just do one care plan"...Our instructor who is also part of our faculty was overwhelmed herself with grading papers, teaching, etc.
We were on a step-down telemetry unit on a cardiac floor.  Sick patients.  I officially became a victim of sexual harassment by a patient.  He had COPD.  I really encouraged the tripod position with him.  One day I had to urge him out of the bathroom because he was in there with no oxygen!!  I was freaking out!  I helped him back into the bed and checked his O2 Sat.  71%!!!  (Normal is 95-100 and even 90 isn't good except for people who compensate).  The next day I accompanied him to the Pulmonary Function Test.  This is a test that essentially measures your lung capacity).  I thought I was going to witness death that day.  That was on a Wednesday.  When I returned to the floor the following Tuesday, he had been discharged.  Alive.
I learned a lot on the cardiac floor.  Many skills, many assessments.  I even assisted with a chest tube removal with a PA!!  Both the patient, his wife, and the Doctor had a running bet that I was going to hit the floor.  They told me that after it was over.  I hadn't really thought about it before, but not much grosses me out anymore.  Later that evening, my kid got her shoestring caught in her bicycle spoke.  I thought I was going to have a panic attack!  I can handle a chest tube any day!

My Garden:
Soon after the weather had warmed and my allergies had set in, I began my garden excavation/renovation.  It was a massive undertaking.  While my classmates cursed me for having already taken Applied Pathophysiology, I was playing in the dirt.  Beautiful. Orange. Dirt. Clay.  Fertile. Wet.  It became my obsession.  I successfully installed a drip irrigation system.  It was so detailed.  I could sit on my stool for hours just staring at the little tubes, hoses, connections, and trying to figure out how or which way I would hook them up to make them most effective.




  The wonderful thing about my garden is that there is no limit to the amount of flowers I can have (more on that later).  I discovered these wonderful flowers called Proven Winners.  They are nothing short of amazing.


Spring Break:
Somewhere lost in time there was Spring Break.  I graciously volunteered to take on the artistic portion of our group project on Venous Thromboembolism.  It was time consuming.  The perfectionist part of me kept adding things.  I think that I spent about 24 woman hours on it.  It was well received by everyone.  I had kudos coming from every direction.  I put so much effort into this that I wondered "why?" when it was over?  Why did I do all this?






New Addition To Our Family!:
Somewhere in the middle of all this Spring Breakin', Clinical Rotations, and gardening, my husband decided it was time to bite the bullet and add a new little heartbeat and mouth to feed into our family.  I had been very skeptical for a while, mainly because I have some OCD issues when it comes to the cleanliness of my house.  I have a place for everything.  What I do not have a place for is pee and poop.
Meet Lexi, our new Maltipoo.  She was born on December 23, 2011.  She is an absolute hoot.  Her and Ruby go together like pees and carrots.  They are constantly playing (Ruby needed some help with her expanding waistline), following each other around, and sleeping together.  They are AWESOME!
As long as Lexi doesn't have free reign over the house, she is doing amazingly well at potty training.  I couldn't be more pleased.  And she loves the girls, too!  And mud!
Square Foot Gardening:
While in the hospital one day I met a patient's wife who was carefully mapping out her landscape.  She explained to me the in's and out's of Mel Bartholomew's Square Foot Gardening Technique.  I thought, "What else do I have to do these days?"  I gave it a try!

I made my own trellis using 1/2" electrical conduit and rebar.  Also 7x7 nylon netting so that my cucs, squash, cantaloupe, and tomatoes grow vertically (I know tomatoes don't grow any way BUT vertically).
I will jump ahead several weeks but will come back later and update Easter.

Remember the Bully?
Well, the director of our Nursing School (AKA the TOP DOG) invited all interested students to participate in a focus group with her.  It was six per group, and believe it or not, not that many people signed up.  I am glad I did.  We sat around and with the support (and initiation) of my peers, told the director everything that had happened to me in the first semester.  She was sad.  Seriously.  She had tears in her eyes.  She said that she was so sorry I had to endure that sort of treatment.  She said she was also happy that I had told her because scholarships are being handed out next week.  And guess who is the front runner for the Single Mom Scholarship??  Yep!  You guessed correctly: the Bully herself.


Who's Who...
Yep.  I am now one of them.  I was inducted just a couple of weeks ago.  I was one of only TWO nursing students and one of only 57 at the University.  Except I didn't pay $19.99 for their cord.  Maybe later.  We'll see.

Finals!
Today I took my final Junior Nursing exam.  I really did not study like I should have.  More than two days of studying may have been more beneficial to me.  I signed in to the test, answered 17 questions (of 85) and was booted out.  This happened six times.  Finally an hour later I found myself in a different building being reassured by Dr. Abrasive herself that I was going to be okay.  Okay.  She said "You know this stuff."  Was there ever a question that I didn't know this stuff?
So the whole time I was answering questions, 10 of which were PILOT questions, I was thinking "OMG, I really don't know this crap. I have debt. This whole nursing school thing has been wasted.  Clinicals were a waste".  I was dying inside.  They were tricky.  I submit.  80.39%!!!!  I will never be a Junior college student again.  I AM A SENIOR!!!


Next on my update list...
-->Trip to Walt Disney World!! (May 5-9)
-->Garden updates and propagation project using cuttings
-->Anything else I may have forgotten
-->And more pics!!

Monday, February 13, 2012

Mindless Behavior

I have been doing some really crazy things lately.  First, and this happened a couple of weeks ago, I had went to Sam's and bought Panera Bread Cheese & Broccoli soup (YUM-O).  I brought it home and ate one whole container the very same day!  A few days went by and I had a craving for some more of that soup.  I opened fridge and could not find it!  I was not a happy camper.

So this past Saturday I was feeding one of my kidlets a nutritious meal of Chef Boyardee Beefaroni.  I opened the cabinet to pull out a sauce pan and guess what I found?  My soup.  One week old.  I can almost taste the bacteria that must have been brewing!

So this past Wednesday night, I hurried to the grocery store with one kid in tow.  I had to pick up the other from her tutoring lesson and I had less than 10 minutes to grab some milk, apples, and wheat bread.  I pondered a little too long over that bag of apples ($5.99) and decided to leave them.  They could eat a sugared up fruit for all I care at that point--but NO way was I paying that much for apples.  I grab my cart (which I affectionately call a 'buggy', but I will spare you the pain of hearing that) and run to the check out.  Except, it wasn't my cart.  I panicked and immediately thought of that poor person who was surely walking around aimlessly looking for her cart.  I hustled it back to produce, passing one guy who had a big smile on his face so I knew he had probably seen her...and yep!  He said "She's back there looking for it...".  I go to the produce section and find this little old lady with three employees trying to help her locate it.  She was really nice about.  I even explained to her how my mind was all over the place.  I am glad I didn't pay for her groceries.  I do not like Rye or Pumpernickel bread.

Yesterday, I had many assignments due.  Assignments that will not be graded in any way.  I believe this is also known as busy work.  Two full days of thrombotic-producing busy work. I am sure that as long as I sat on that couch, my venous return has to be compromised.  So enough of that.  I did laundry, OCD-cleaned my house, and ran to the commissary.  I knew it would be crowded from after-church rush, but I could handle it.  So I get there, see the crowd, and as I venture further in, it is evident that there is no food.  I am on the Lunchable/salty meat/bread isle when this lady has a conversation with me about the shelves being wiped clean.  We talk and I tell her it gets worse over on the frozen foods.  I grab my cart and go strolling along.  "Ma'am, Ma'am, excuse me..."  I turn around and it was the no-Lunchable lady and she says "You took my shopping cart!!"  I turn back to look, and sure enough, there it is--her purse and everything.  I explained to her my earlier incident from Wednesday and she was so understanding.

I am mortified.  How am I missing all of this detail?  Running away with people's buggies!  I have got to get a grip on all this thoughtlessness!

Saturday, February 11, 2012

On a more positive note...

I took my first Med/Surg Exam on Monday morning and made an 87.5%!!  It covered the following: Respiratory, PICC, CAVD, Injections, Intro to PMHI, IV Therapy, Delegation, and Fluids/Electrolytes.  In the midst of my weekly clinical grief I totally forgot to post something of such utter importance.  Shame on me!

My next exam covers Cardio, Immune, and something else which I can't remember.

I still contribute my success to my MacBook.  It has been my saving grace!

Have a great weekend!!

Thursday, February 9, 2012

I wanna hide under a large rock.


I have had the most horrible two days in Clinical Rotation…all you nurses reading, please advise!  Here is my scenario, and for the sake of privacy, I will be switching up my stories!

The hospital I am at has med/surg floors that deal with specific illnesses, like most hospitals do.  The type of floor I am on is not relevant I suppose, but the following information is.  My MAR indicated an IVPB of Penicillin G Potassium to be hung at 1000.  Already flowing in the primary was 20 meq potassium in NS with magnesium sulfate.  I was told by my instructor to be ready at 1000 to dispense medications.  Now keep in mind that 5 other students in my group are administering medications.  In what we call the “IDEAL” world, there is a 30 minute window to give meds.  Our instructor expects this to happen.  So here is the dialogue, listed in times incremements:

Me 1000: Meds ready, brain ready.
Her 10-1115: With other students giving meds.
Me 1116: ???
Her 1117: Ok tell me about your medications (standing in the nurses station)
Me 1117: “Ok I have this and that…and Penicillin G Potassium 100 ml/per hour, the fluids are compatible because I looked it up in the IV Compatibility book”
Her 1118: “Really?  Are you sure about that?”
Me: “Yes, because I looked in this book and there seems to be no interactions according to it.”
Her: “You sound like you are second guessing yourself.  You really aren’t sure are you?  Do you realize that you are almost 2 hours late giving this medication?  Do you understand what this means?  And now, you aren’t even sure that these medications are compatible after I have given you all this time to look them up?”
Me 1119:  <about to pass out>
Her: “You need to get on the phone with a pharmacist right now and determine if these are compatible.”
Me:  I scurry to the phone trying to look as confident as I possibly can, because after all, I HAVE just second-guessed myself.  So I call Pharmacy and get put on hold.  She is getting even more angered by the second.  She sees a Pharmacist sitting across the nurse’s station.  Tells me to hang up and go ask him.  I do.  I tell him the situation.  He writes it down and says he will get to it.  I go back and tell her.  She says “No, you need to go ask him again.”  So I go ask him again and he says that he is in the middle of writing orders and will look at it in a bit.  She is fuming!!  Tells me to get back on the phone with Pharmacy.  I call.  I hold.  Someone calls back and says the Pharmacist is unavailable because he is assisting with Chemo meds.  During this time, another nurse hears our debacle.  She shows the instructor an intranet website the hospital uses to check for compatibility.  And golly gee darn, the meds ARE compatible.   Guess what time it is?  1155.  So we head to the med box to gather the medications that should have been given almost two hours earlier.  Guess what?  The meds have already been given by the nurse who is over that room. 
I felt so cruddy about myself.  In post-conference she mentioned the situation to the group.  Said she was very disappointed in the way we prepare meds and how we do not know our drugs.  So last night I came home and was DETERMINED not to let her defeat me.  I made my own patient “brain” which is a sheet that I write all my Vitals on, medications, allergies, etc.  Basically all of the pertinent information that you really need to know at all times.  I had a plan to be very organized and informed and show her that I could rebound from the day before (which really wasn’t my fault, right??).

Wednesday:
Pre Conference begins.  She advises us that we really need to be “on it” today and know what we are doing.  Meds need to be given in a 30-minute window.  She should not have to do anything but walk up to us, and without saying anything, we need to start spouting off everything she needs to know (side effects, interactions, indications, etc.)
Remember that I had a plan to have ALL my ducks in a row.  I was giving a Beta Blocker, I need to know the Blood Pressure and Heartrate prior to administering.  Did that.  I had lab values.  I had side effects.

Her 1045 (after giving her all this premeditated knowledge):  “Really?  Hmm.  What is her diagnosis?”
Me: “She has ABC, XYZ, and JKL.  She was prescribed the blocker because of consistently high BP’s and HR for the last few days.”
Her: “No, what is her Medical History?  What is the reason she was here for before?”
Me: <Sweating, about to die>: Umm, well, this is a blank floor, so she has been treated previously for blank.  But now she is being treated for ABC, XYZ, and JKL.
Her: <Long stare, too long IMO>: “Really?  You really don’t know what she is here for do you?  You have no idea.”  She says to classmate: “Jane, do you think you could help her find out why her patient is in the hospital?” To me: “This is what we discussed in pre-conference.  I have given you all this time and you STILL are not ready.

I am on the verge of tears.  I have become resentful.  How is it that I shouldn’t be feeling some resentment? 

The weirdest part: I come home and take a nap.  I am physically and emotionally drained.  I sleep for three hours and when I wake up I realize what I have been dreaming about.  People dressed in Wendy’s costume (from the Wendy’s Commercial) who I had caught stealing medications and they tried to have them filled at the pharmacy.  I dream I am involved in a lawsuit involving those medications. I dream of an old, dear friend who had a blow up mannequin to travel with.  There is way more, but I should save some for later.